the language of loss
by LadyMoriel
Summary: After Nar Shaddaa, Mako's grieving a fresh loss. The bounty hunter isn't really sure what to do with that. Spoilers for the Nar Shaddaa part of the Bounty Hunter storyline. This is just a little scene between Mako and my bounty hunter, a mostly light-side Chiss named Shastasa.


Mako doesn't know how long she's been sitting on her bed, staring at nothing, when a knock on the bulkhead startles her. She glances up, sees Shastasa in the doorway, and wipes pointlessly at her eyes. She's pretty sure she looks like she's been crying, but she hasn't even been able to do that since they found Anuli dead on the floor. Just kept it together until they returned to the ship, and then she retreated to the crew quarters she would have shared with him, and she's just been…sitting here. The place inside her where her little almost-brother used to be feels too hollow for tears.

"Hey," Mako says, and the word comes out as a croak.

The bounty hunter shifts uncomfortably. "You busy?"

"No." Mako laughs weakly. "Really, really not. I could definitely use a distraction, though."

"We'll hit Dromund Kaas soon," Shastasa says—unnecessarily, because Mako was the one who plotted their course in the navicomputer. "It's not Nar Shaddaa, but it's…not boring." Also not new information.

"Okay," Mako says, unable to think of anything else.

The bounty hunter looks at the floor for a second, the fingers of one hand tapping against her leg in what Mako would call a nervous gesture on basically anyone else, and then without preamble she blurts out, "I'm sorry about Anuli. He seemed like a good kid." The words are stiff and abrupt, but they still read as sincere.

"He was," Mako says, looking down. "He didn't deserve any of this. I suppose if I'd thought about it, I would have expected something like this to happen, getting caught up in something too big because he was too smart for his own good, smart enough to be somebody else's asset without really being able to protect himself, but…I always sort of thought I'd be there too, where I could at least try to protect him."

Shastasa grimaces. "Can't protect everyone."

"I know. Believe me, I know." Come to think of it, she's not sure she's been able to protect _anyone_ since Braden took her in, which is…not something she really needs to think about right now. "It just…I know the galaxy isn't fair, but it doesn't seem _right_ that we were together again after so long, I was going to get him out of there and help him find a place where people wouldn't just want to _use_ him, and then…" She presses her lips together. If she keeps on like this, she really is going to cry, and she's nearly positive that's not what she needs or wants just yet. She already knows she's going to have nightmares about seeing and hearing him die over the holo.

"I'm sorry," the bounty hunter says again.

"Anyway." Mako clears her throat. "I wanted to thank you. For earlier, when you let me choose what to do with the Eidolon. That was…kind."

Shastasa looks startled. "Your claim took precedence. I would never ignore that."

"Still. He was your target and you didn't have to ask, so…I appreciate it."

"Right," Shastasa says, still fidgeting. "Well. Anyway, that's not really why I came to find you. I was reorganizing one of the storage units and I know I won't use this, which means it's just taking up space. So if you can get it out of my way—" She sticks out her hand.

Mako automatically accepts the little object she's holding. It looks like an ordinary earpiece, until she turns it over and sees the Czerka Corporation logo on the side, and then she feels her eyes widen. "Is this a Czerka universal translator? It is, isn't it? I've been looking for one of these for _ages_! Where did you _find_ this?"

Shastasa shrugs, sort of jerkily. "Like I said, it was lying around and I don't have room for stuff I don't need, so can you do something with it?"

Mako closes her hand around the earpiece, her mind already buzzing with possibilities. She might even be able to wire it right into her own implants, if she's _very_ careful—and even if she can't, it's guaranteed to be about forty times better than the mess she kludged together a year ago out of mostly broken protocol-droid parts. For that matter, if she can take it apart, she might even be able to make a better version herself. "Absolutely. Yes. I know just the spot."

"Right, well. Good." The hunter nods, still stiffly, and leaves the room.

Mako finds herself smiling down at the translator device. It's tiny, hardly something that would take up much unnecessary space, and more to the point Mako's been keeping the storage units organized herself. As recently as two days ago, the translator wasn't anywhere on the ship. It looks practically new, too, not some piece of salvage fished out of a Nar Shaddaa trash pile. She's not going to say anything, but Mako knows a thoughtful gift when she sees one, not to mention a kind gesture from someone who's more comfortable with acting than talking.

She already hoped she would find a friend under Shastasa's gruff, scarred exterior, and now she's certain that softer side does exist. Nothing can bring back Braden or Anuli or anyone else she's lost, but sometimes it's nice to be reminded that she hasn't lost everyone.

* * *

 _I like the concept of emergent storytelling in games but it's not something I see much in practice, and then this happened: right after finishing the Nar Shaddaa part of the class storyline and therefore almost immediately after Anuli's death, I just happened to get a companion gift in Mako's favorite category. It was such a perfect coincidence that I wanted to expand on it a little. (Also, this is another exercise in trying to write and complete more short fics.)_


End file.
